Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Pot Free For 24 Hrs

At this moment, I have been free from marijuana for 24 hrs. I have nearly all of the withdrawal symptoms: night sweats, sweaty hands and feet, insomnia, nausea, no appetite, and I'm very irritable. The only symptom I'm not exhibiting is having a headache which is suppose to be the most common side effect. I'm glad my head doesn't hurt because this inner-unrest and mild nausea is all I wanna deal with.

I've considered quitting marijuana occasionally over the past several years. Before, it always seemed worth it to me. The comfort and relief I got from marijuana compared to the cost (monetary and emotional) was totally worth it. It didn't matter that pot made me lazy and unable to follow complicated thoughts because it kept me from wanting to end my own life. My parents, who aren't afflicted by mental illness, had no respect for my decision to use this wondrous herb. Looking back, I'm really glad I played the rebel and followed my intuition. Pot gave me an appreciation for life that I was blind to. However, I think I've inhaled all the wisdom pot has to give to me now and I'm feeling I'll be best off abstaining from it and pursuing healthier interests.

I'm still fascinated by spirituality and plan on using my new clear head to develop personally. I'll probably attend more buddhist meetings and hopefully start exercising. When I'm high, I usually opt to not go to the buddhist group I like so much cuz everyone there isn't high. Getting high also eradicates any desire to exercise. Not being high should also make school easier, like, a lot easier. I try to not smoke three hours before my class, but even after three hours of not smoking I'm still far from average. The shit makes me dumber... there's no questioning that...

The hardest part of abstaining from marijuana that I foresee is going to be the whole friends thing. All my homies are stoners, and I'm going to want to smoke around them. I don't know people that don't smoke herbs. Oh well, we'll see how it goes down. Wish me luck!

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